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At 8:32 AM,
Bump-ed up pompidoo said...
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Excellent Poem.. Brilliant piece of work
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At 10:16 AM,
divyesh said...
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At 10:25 AM,
divyesh said...
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thats a cool poem....truely original..and tells ur story too :)
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At 10:36 AM,
13thRandom said...
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Using big words does not help in making of a poem . On the contrary, simple words but strong sentences make great poetry. This is more of prose than poetry. Please don't focus so much on rhyming coz when one tends to focus so much on using words that rhyme you end up destroying the poem.
All in all, an amateurish attempt, coz I have seen better from you.
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At 10:38 AM,
ks said...
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nice one........
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At 11:11 PM,
Unknown said...
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hi..
funny...thougtful
n well like always touches the cord of the heart
very true
yes
i had always liked ur poems for their honesty...
keep up the good work... always appreciate the fact that you are strong enuff to make ur own decisions... n not bogged down by peer pressure...
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At 11:52 PM,
I-m-me said...
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Thank Sai, Div, Kaake, Shweta glad u all liked the poem.
13th random lets take ur comment point by point.
"Using big words does not help in making of a poem" - Which big words u referring to??
"On the contrary, simple words but strong sentences make great poetry" - true and i have kept the words simple enough for any average reader to understand.
"This is more of prose than poetry" - I do not know of any prose that has such short sentences.
"Please don't focus so much on rhyming coz when one tends to focus so much on using words that rhyme you end up destroying the poem" - Keeping my thoughts intact if i manage to rhyme it also... what is the harm? I personally find non-rhyming poems boring (but there can be exceptions)
"All in all, an amateurish attempt, coz I have seen better from you" - Ok hope to write better next time. Thanks for ur comment.
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At 12:08 AM,
Ashrita said...
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Rhymes, or no rhymes, a poem is a great piece to read and appreciate as long as we are able to perceive things from the poet's perspective. And I can totally do that in here :)
So great work Celestial... As long as you do what your mind is happy doing, no office job of sitting around even which pays you double would satisfy you :)
Cheers!
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At 11:36 PM,
NIDHI JAIN said...
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Nice poem.. says it all with a brave face. :) Just like you.
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At 8:21 AM,
Unknown said...
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nice one re...
excellent effort...
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At 9:23 AM,
Scott said...
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Very Nice.